# My Advice on How to Get Your Twin Flame Back **URL:** \ **Category:** General\ **Created:** [March 6, 2026, 7:23am UTC](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/my-advice-on-how-to-get-your-twin-flame-back/1263 "2026-03-06T07:23:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![mystic-waters](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/user_avatar/forum.twinflamecollective.com/mystic-waters/32/193_2.png) [@mystic-waters](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/u/mystic-waters)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2026, 7:23am UTC](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/my-advice-on-how-to-get-your-twin-flame-back/1263/1 "2026-03-06T07:23:54Z")
I thought we could do a thread collecting all the advice on _how_ to actually get your twin flame back. Keep seeing new people joining and asking, so having one thread to point to might be good. First two threads I think I would point to are from @Cassady first understanding _what_ this all is and then what _inner work_ is. So step 1: > [@What The REAL Twin Flame Journey Is](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/what-the-real-twin-flame-journey-is/523): > > I think that most people here already know what twin flames are and what the journey is really about. I really liked [this thread](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/are-twin-flames-real/483) where we got into different beliefs and opinions a bit. I think for the sake of anyone who is stumbling into this for the first time or who has maybe heard the term on social media and not really encountered it before, we should maybe talk about what the journey really involves. Because I don’t think the endless changes in terminology on social media are doing a good … Then step 2: > [@What IS Twin Flame Inner Work? (The Only Thing for Reaching Union)](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/what-is-twin-flame-inner-work-the-only-thing-for-reaching-union/962): > > You’ve probably heard the term “inner work” used pretty often when people talk about the twin flame journey, especially given as advice. “Just do it” The problem is (as with a lot of terminology) that it means different things to different people and if it really was as simple as just this generic idea of “doing inner work” then we would have a lot more success stories more often. I won’t pretend to have all the answers (and you should be wary of anyone who does), but maybe I can at… **If you’re confused by step 2:** Then you probably need to work on surrender, in which case I would read this: > [@How Do I Actually Surrender to TF Journey?](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/how-do-i-actually-surrender-to-tf-journey/1037): > > It is always the same advice everywhere that we need to surrender to the journey and union will come but what does that really mean? How do you actually do that… in practice. I think I’m someone who’s always needed to understand things logically. If something doesn’t make sense, I research it until it does and there is so much mixed up information. Sometimes I think I have surrendered but then I go another few months, still in separation and nothing seems to have changed. Then, when I question… **And then finally,** there is a new thread of a runner giving advice to chasers on how to get their twin back: > [@Runner Advice: What to Do When Your Twin Flame Runs](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/runner-advice-what-to-do-when-your-twin-flame-runs/1201): > > I see you. Chasers are looking for advice on what to do when their twin flame runs. That gut-punch ache when they vanish again. I know it from the other side because I’ve been the runner. We’ve switched roles over multiple lifetimes, but I’ve been the runner more often than the chaser. Even when things are going well with us, I still wake up some mornings with the urge to bolt. I’ve pushed him away so hard that it triggered brutal suicidal ideation on his end. I hate that I did that. I’m owning… Obviously, we have hundreds of other threads for specific things, but I would say these are the main threads and the main things that people need to know. I think we all have a unique path to walk, so the specifics on when and how we do things might change, but overall, this advice should help anyone if they want to actually end separation. Personally, for me, the biggest thing was shadow work, journaling, and [guided meditation](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/guided-meditation-for-twin-flames/1262). ---
**Author:** ![Spirit](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/user_avatar/forum.twinflamecollective.com/spirit/32/12_2.png) [@Spirit](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/u/Spirit)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2026, 7:23am UTC](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/my-advice-on-how-to-get-your-twin-flame-back/1263/2 "2026-03-06T07:23:55Z")
**Confused by the runner-chaser dynamic?** Get clarity with your personalized Twin Flame reading. Unlimited Tarot spreads to dig into your twin flame journey. **[Get Your Unlimited Readings Here](https://twinflamecollective.com/free-twin-flame-personal-reading/?Source_Field=Forum)** ---
**Author:** ![Show\_Up\_For\_YOU](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/user_avatar/forum.twinflamecollective.com/show_up_for_you/32/352_2.png) [@Show\_Up\_For\_YOU](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/u/Show_Up_For_YOU)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2026, 3:16pm UTC](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/my-advice-on-how-to-get-your-twin-flame-back/1263/3 "2026-03-06T15:16:20Z")
Glad someone finally put this all in one place. One thing that doesn’t get enough attention is journaling as part of shadow work. OP mentioned it briefly, but it deserves more. During separation, I’d journal daily about my triggers, then review entries for patterns. Abandonment fear was mine. It kept showing up in disguise. Shadow work is layered. You peel one back and find another. Early ones are obvious, but deeper stuff takes months. Memory’s unreliable. We lie to ourselves constantly. A journal cuts through that. You can’t BS it. What helped me: specific questions like, when my twin went distant, “Where am I distant with myself?” or “What am I withholding that I want from him?” Uncomfortable, but it works because you already know the answer. For newbies: Shadow work means facing rejected parts, the swallowed anger, denied needs. Your twin mirrors it all. That’s the point. So journal. Be brutal on the page. ---
**Author:** ![Betterusha](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/user_avatar/forum.twinflamecollective.com/betterusha/32/295_2.png) [@Betterusha](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/u/Betterusha)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2026, 3:19pm UTC](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/my-advice-on-how-to-get-your-twin-flame-back/1263/4 "2026-03-06T15:19:21Z")
Surrender is where we lie to ourselves most. It’s inner work on you plus handing the outcome to the divine. You can’t just say “_if it’s meant to be_” while skipping the healing. That’s avoidance in spiritual drag. The tricky part: 3D vs. 5D. We pick one, collapse into 3D pain or bypass to 5D fantasy. Real surrender holds both: accept 3D without it defining you, stay connected to 5D without dodging feelings. Chasers (speaking from experience, with love): waiting at their feet blocks their healing. Pull back, focus on you. That’s true love, even if it feels like abandonment. Setting boundaries helps them face their stuff. Surrender signs: calmer vibes, no obsessing. Joy in your own life again. Happiness untethered from getting a text from your runner. The OP’s guided meditation is gold for this, minefield at first, but it quiets the noise so you hear yourself. ---
**Author:** ![Affectionation](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/user_avatar/forum.twinflamecollective.com/affectionation/32/294_2.png) [@Affectionation](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/u/Affectionation)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2026, 3:32pm UTC](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/my-advice-on-how-to-get-your-twin-flame-back/1263/5 "2026-03-06T15:32:39Z")
Solid list, runner thread especially. Chasers need to hear from runners way more. Runners aren’t fleeing you. They’re running from themselves. The connection drags up their unhealed fears, intimacy and vulnerability, and it overwhelms them. Many aren’t even spiritually aware. It’s like your whole reality flips overnight. Terrifying if you haven’t done inner work (which most of us haven’t done before we awaken to this journey). Chasers, you’re out of balance too. Codependency and abandonment fears feed the cycle. Seeking validation makes it worse. The more you chase, the faster they bolt. Both sides need healing to shift things. Pattern breaks when you stop chasing and focus on you, not as a trick (they’ll sense it), but real growth. Heal that abandonment wound. Stop looking to them for wholeness. That needy energy repels them. Roles can flip too. Heal enough, and you might become the “runner” while they feel the pull. Energetics are wild like that. ---
**Author:** ![HarmonyFlow](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/user_avatar/forum.twinflamecollective.com/harmonyflow/32/50_2.png) [@HarmonyFlow](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/u/HarmonyFlow)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2026, 3:44pm UTC](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/my-advice-on-how-to-get-your-twin-flame-back/1263/6 "2026-03-06T15:44:26Z")
I spent far too long just waiting for him to come back. Decided this is the end of constantly doing the same thing over and over again. Definition of insanity. Thank you for this, I need to start figuring out what to do to make a real change. ---
**Author:** ![QuietStrength](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/user_avatar/forum.twinflamecollective.com/quietstrength/32/180_2.png) [@QuietStrength](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/u/QuietStrength)\ **Post date:** [March 6, 2026, 3:45pm UTC](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/my-advice-on-how-to-get-your-twin-flame-back/1263/7 "2026-03-06T15:45:57Z")
Both things can be true at once. I’ve been opening my heart to whatever connection is meant for me, whether that’s my TF or someone entirely new, and that’s been my version of surrender. Even while honoring how sacred this bond feels. You can want to make space for something that actually pours into you and still feel that pull across the distance. Those feelings just coexist. When you’re ready to let go, you’ll know. Until then there’s really no fighting it. ---
**Author:** ![TwinJourneyComplete](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/letter_avatar_proxy/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@TwinJourneyComplete](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/u/TwinJourneyComplete)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2026, 3:36am UTC](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/my-advice-on-how-to-get-your-twin-flame-back/1263/8 "2026-03-09T03:36:26Z")
This is the kind of thing we should be focused on more. I read this guide by Danielle a while ago and that got me started on the path to healing. > **[How to Get Your Twin Flame Back: Choosing the Smart Path - Pure Twin Flames](https://puretwinflames.com/how-to-get-your-twin-flame-back-choosing-the-smart-path/)** > > Periods of separation can often be painful, frustrating and full of doubt. Technically everything I write focuses on how to get your twin flame back but I ---
**Author:** ![sacred-union](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/user_avatar/forum.twinflamecollective.com/sacred-union/32/169_2.png) [@sacred-union](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/u/sacred-union)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2026, 9:42am UTC](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/my-advice-on-how-to-get-your-twin-flame-back/1263/9 "2026-03-10T09:42:18Z")
I think it’s good to focus on what moves your journey forward and that will look different for everyone but I also think we should be patient with ourselves and understand what chasing is. > [@What is chasing, anyway?](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/what-is-chasing-anyway/817): > > What constitutes chasing in an energetic way? What can they feel? Does just thinking about him do it because it’s near constant. Once I didn’t think of him for a few hours but then he popped straight back in my brain. AFAIK my DM isn’t on social media. I’ve never seen him unless he’s under a different name. So that’s good. I’m a massive overthinker/obsessive person anyway. I think I’ve got ADHD which doesn’t help. My brain plays little movies of scenarios with various people. Because I don’t k… Just thinking about your twin flame does not mean you are chasing. If they pop into your head when you wake up in the morning that does not mean you’re doing the wrong thing. ---
**Author:** ![MoonGoddess](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/user_avatar/forum.twinflamecollective.com/moongoddess/32/28_2.png) [@MoonGoddess](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/u/MoonGoddess)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2026, 3:24am UTC](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/my-advice-on-how-to-get-your-twin-flame-back/1263/10 "2026-03-12T03:24:07Z")
Unconditional love in action. What a gift to this community. ---
**Author:** ![MyTrueLove](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/user_avatar/forum.twinflamecollective.com/mytruelove/32/299_2.png) [@MyTrueLove](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/u/MyTrueLove)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2026, 8:01pm UTC](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/my-advice-on-how-to-get-your-twin-flame-back/1263/11 "2026-03-13T20:01:17Z")
Honestly the whole game is just focusing on yourself. I know it sounds counterintuitive when all you want is to be with them, but that chasing energy creates more distance. Every time. The universe seems to respond way more to your inner state than whatever you’re actually doing outwardly. Took me a while to really get that. When you shift that attention back to your own growth, things just start moving. In ways you could never have forced. ---
**Author:** ![astral\_traveler](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/user_avatar/forum.twinflamecollective.com/astral_traveler/32/27_2.png) [@astral\_traveler](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/u/astral_traveler)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2026, 10:39am UTC](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/my-advice-on-how-to-get-your-twin-flame-back/1263/12 "2026-03-14T10:39:50Z")
True spiritual love just doesn’t need manipulation tactics. Like those “manifest your TF to break no contact” videos. That whole energy feels off to me. What’s genuinely meant for you should make both people feel joyful and free. Just my take. ---
**Author:** ![GentleGrace](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/user_avatar/forum.twinflamecollective.com/gentlegrace/32/97_2.png) [@GentleGrace](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/u/GentleGrace)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2026, 3:32pm UTC](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/my-advice-on-how-to-get-your-twin-flame-back/1263/13 "2026-03-16T15:32:42Z")
Ego work changed everything for me. Once I figured out how to actually dismiss those patterns, the thoughts of my twin didn’t stop, but they turned into something that just felt like pure love. Completely different energy. Your heart is trying to tell you something underneath all that pain. Once you see it for what it is, you can’t unsee it. Look into ego work specifically (not just general shadow work but ego dissolution stuff), because that’s what finally shifted things for me. ---
**Author:** ![Sazla1983](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/letter_avatar_proxy/v4/letter/s/7ba0ec/32.png) [@Sazla1983](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/u/Sazla1983)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2026, 12:03am UTC](https://forum.twinflamecollective.com/t/my-advice-on-how-to-get-your-twin-flame-back/1263/14 "2026-03-17T00:03:32Z")
I started a small business, journaling, meditation, opening my heart chakra and started studying online. I focused completely on myself and how I could feel better. Very shortly I started to feel euphoric I was so happy everyone thought we were already reunited but deep down I didn’t understand why there was no movement. Synchronicities increased and I could feel this pure love towards my TF. Then I realised I was meditating to strengthen the connection, what I should have been doing was facing the difficult stuff like inner child healing. Wishing a few days we were talking again. It was unconventional how it happened and not like I though it would but at least we are talking again.