Well said, and a lot of this needs to be said.
TikTok videos are great for introducing people to the journey when they’re out there trying to understand what they’re going through but it also leads a lot of people who are not twin flames into a weird situation where they allow themselves to sit back because they get the idea that some dream relationship is just promised to them.
You need to work at it.
Shadow work isn’t just identifying your triggers. It’s sitting with the parts of yourself that make you deeply uncomfortable. When your twin ghosts you and rage bubbles up - that rage didn’t start with them. Maybe it goes back to a parent who was inconsistent, or a first relationship where you learned love equals pain. You have to trace it back and actually feel it, not just acknowledge it exists.
The Mirror Exercise can work, but people often do it superficially or use this misused, twisted version. “My twin won’t commit” becomes “I won’t commit to myself” and they think they’re done. But the real work is asking: where specifically am I not committed to myself? What does that actually mean in my daily life? Am I avoiding difficult conversations? Settling for less than I deserve?
The mirror shows you the exact wound, not just a general concept.
And it’s not just about blaming yourself constantly or being beholden to someone else. It’s about being open and honest with yourself about where you need to improve, because we all have areas where we can work on ourselves. That doesn’t mean we blame ourselves or let others off the hook for bad behavior; it means setting aside our ego.
Kundalini awakening through twin flame meeting is real, but it’s not always this blissful opening. Sometimes it’s terrifying. Your whole reality framework can crumble in weeks. Physical symptoms can be intense - some people end up thinking they’re having medical emergencies. If this happens, ground yourself. Literally go outside barefoot, eat root vegetables, move your body.