I was the chaser for the last 2 months and told myself I was doing really well, I hadn’t contacted him but I would meditate and send him good energy in the hopes that would be enough. Then this morning I saw a Facebook post on a group page with a large picture of him as the post was all about him. I ‘Liked’ the post which is the first time I made any contact in 2 months. Within a few hours I went into panic and decided I don’t want him anymore. I even switched off my phone worrying he’ll contact. I think this means things are shifting that I am no longer the chaser. Even as I write I’m am thinking the last thing I want right now is any contact. It’s so weird that one action changed everything.
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I hope mine does I would love for her to do that to me
I have a question for anyone who has reached union. I am not quite there yet, we are talking but he’s still stating no relationship but also wants to see me again. Last time we saw each other I was so nervous and full of energy I was physically shaking.
Now we are meeting again I am really confident and taking it a nice morning out for coffee and looking forward to it but he’s saying he’s really nervous.
Can this be part of the journey of the push pull with changing emotions? He is still the runner as I would take him back instantly but he is all over the place. There attraction and he really likes me by can’t see it becoming a relationship.
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There was a thread about this from a few weeks back:
And just in general it seems to be a pattern that it can switch, sometimes multiple times.
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I feel like I am the runner again as I’ve booked to visit him and he’s being very nonchalant about it. He invited me and all he could say was see you then and it’s nearly a month away
They say, when you chase, you’re actually pushing them away. When you stop chasing and focus on yourself, you attract.
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Don’t try to analyze it too hard right now. Let the dust settle. The fact that one small action revealed how much had already shifted internally tells me your healing has been far more profound than you’ve been giving yourself credit for. Trust what your body and emotions are telling you.
Yes, it happens after a while. New lessons get learned quickly.
Now I understand some of what he was going through with me while he was chasing, persuading, and waiting for me, yet I am running.
The hardest part of this journey is the running and chasing dynamic. It’s a spiritual awakening journey, deeper into the soul level, where we realize we’re not separate, we’re sharing one soul.
It can go backward and forwards! It doesn’t just swap once.
He’s run again and this time he’s just ghosted so I’m running too good riddance to him
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I’m 4.5 years in and from my experience, once the energy shifts it can feel like they’re energetically chasing. I’m hit all the time through telepathy. Almost like him hounding me. Saying the same thing over and over. The human in me says, if you have something to say, just pick up a phone already.
If that’s what he felt in the beginning from my initial push, it’s no wonder he ran to the hills.
I believe currently, the energy is “pushing” me to further focus on myself, but It’s annoying AF.
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I can feel him pushing me everyday. I have reached surrender now which feels so much better. I actually love him with no anger, jealousy or anxiety and happy living my life. But I do pick up on on telepathically and think for goodness sake just send a message!
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How do you feel him oushing you? Can you describe iz? Thank you
I echo the sentiment of others: ‘runner/chaser’ seems more a relatable framework than a distinct duality. As counterparts, we share a remarkably intense energetic connection. Being contained to meat suits with childhood trauma, it takes a lot of refinement to hold that energy without collapsing. So around and around we go, clumsily practicing this dance until we can learn to do it without stepping on each other’s toes.
My counterpart and I met in 2014 and he immediately seemed to sense the connection. At the time, I’m not sure he knew exactly what to do with it and I wasn’t interested (single mom in college, with 2 jobs - ain’t nobody got time fo dating). We stayed in contact for a decade - primarily due to his efforts. In that framework, I’d have been labeled as *The Runner *initially - though it seemed more an Incubation Period. Knowing what I know now, I’m certain our lil nervous systems would not have been prepared for our shared energy at that time. We’d have burned each other to crisps.
In 2024 it ‘clicked’ for me with such intensity that I didn’t care that he’d since moved 1,000 miles away, I wanted a deeper relationship. Initially, we were both all-in. Over the next year and a half though, it became a very standard ‘runner/chaser’ dynamic with him running, and me as The Chaser. We had greater capacity to navigate our energy, and each round of that cycle pushed me closer to myself. This felt like the Cleansing Fire.
His ‘running’ behaviors (emotional distancing, distraction, drinking, etc) shocked me out of old patterns of self-sacrifice. As the child of an abusive alcoholic, that savior/martyr complex and the belief that it was natural (or even noble) to suffer to earn love were deeply engrained in my psyche. He already loved me so completely - I could feel that without question. It was only in that precise balance of pure love & familiar dysfunction that I found the awareness & strength to shed those layers. Eventually, I got the strength to leave. The space allowed me to call more of my inner masculine energy back to myself, and for him to create space for his own inner feminine energy.
For the past few months, we have been slowly reintegrating and I am back in what would typically be labeled The Runner. He is talking about moving here and marriage. As a human, I love him on such an unbearably profound level that of course I want that. I’d choose him over and over again.
However, on a soul level, I recognize that he is still navigating his own release of life-long patterns - people-pleasing & a general aversion to confronting difficult emotions among them. Until he has the capacity to ‘meet me’ energetically, I won’t encourage him to move here and risk losing himself to keep me. Similarly, my own inner balance gets thrown out of wack when we’re close in the 3D, and that capacity needs refinement. I won’t make a choice that keeps us ‘stuck’ in an old cycle just because my brain and body want him closer. I’ve asked for ‘pauses’ (2-6 weeks of no-contact) during this reintegration to create a space to nurture our own internal energetic processes without focusing on managing the day-to-day of an external relationship. It is difficult and I’d like it to be over… but it feels right.
I won’t downplay how utterly exhausting it is at times. Truly disrespectful that throughout all of this journey, we still gotta pay the bills, clean the litter-box, etc.
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I hope so I have been bombarded with music songs its her way of talking to me or one of them. When I went on holiday in the spring Holly humberstone cruel world was playing in the cafe its about someone wanting to be with someone they love and not being able to I just came back from another holiday and similar songs were all over I wish she would come out of the blue and do something about it I already told her now she needs to come to me I hope she does.