Seriously I don’t know what I’m doing or who I am now. Feel like I’m being slowly taken apart, dismantled. Like I want to cry but I can’t. And sometimes I need to scream and sometimes I do that, in the car when I’m driving along so nobody will think something awful is happening. Been getting heart chakra pains and same thing but round the back. Feeling a bit worried about what will happen next. Can’t talk to anyone I know either. It comes and goes, part of awakening I guess but no idea how long it will go on for and what other affects there will be. How life has changed.
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From a spiritual perspective, the pain in your back and (I suspect) spinal area symbolizes a lack of support, or financial stress, or a trauma related to some kind of insecurity.
It would explain why you feel like you’re “being slowly taken apart, dismantled”.
You’re likely feeling your twin flame’s emotions, and your wish to cry but not being able to, shows that they are suppressing these emotions, and trying to keep a straight face on the outside.
There’s not much you can do since these are your twin’s emotions, not yours. However, you try to perform actions that encourage you to open up about your own feelings and emotions. This will create a “mirror” effect that will encourage your twin flame to do the same. 
Not many people are aware (for some reason) that the root cause of many illnesses and diseases is actually supressed emotions.
Fear, stress and anxiety do take a toll on the human body!
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When it comes to suppressing emotions, if our twin flame is suppressing their emotions, can we have difficulties accessing our own emotions?
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Very insightful! I didn’t even think that this could be coming from him. And I was thinking the back stuff was heart chakra related.
I’ve lost 2 family members in 3 years and feel like I barely think about them or express emotions. I couldn’t cry over them and the feelings I have over everything else that’s going on. But I did a meditation for releasing emotions and tears started flowing so that was good.
The funny thing is I cry easily over things that are nothing to do with me (reading about sad stuff that has happened to people etc) but can’t cry over my own life stuff. But maybe this will help and allow my twin to release things too.
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In short, yes. My pains are in my throat. Like heartburn but not that, and further up. Feels like throat chakra activity which is significant as both my twin and I have a vocal expression block in different ways. It disappears just as suddenly as it came on and often happens at work (we are colleagues, albeit working in different locations). Sometimes I feel like a bottle being tossed around in the sea with how unpredictable everything seems.
You’re definitely not alone 
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You’re welcome @2greykitties.
It likely is still related to the heart chakra, because that lack of support is likely as a result of loved ones not helping or providing any care or empathy. Hence your comment about family members.
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No. Quite opposite in fact.
Emotions carry a specific type of energy. And a twin flame dynamic is very much a closed loop energy system between two transceivers.
If one side of the the system is blocked off, and doesn’t process an emotion externally, than the emotional energy doesn’t just go away or disappear. It gets sent internally to the other side, at an intensified rate.
The best way I can describe it is by using fluid dynamics.
Think of it like sqeezing the bottom of a plastic water bottle. The force will be sent to the top, and if you sqeeze hard enough, the lid will fly off because the energy has nowhere to go.
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Interesting. I asked that because I’m trying to explain to myself why, during our last separation, for the first month and a half I felt cold. I had the feeling that I didn’t care where he was or whether we would reunite. I put the focus on myself and lived my own life.
Then I saw his photo and all the emotions suddenly surfaced. In that surge of emotions, his message arrived — one he sent by accident — and that same night I dreamed of him for the first time as available, happy, with an immense love that in real life stands behind his fears. It felt as if we had truly met in the dream.
That day I felt him as if we had really been together — love, peace, happiness, a sense of his presence. And since then, everything in my energy has been changing.
My focus is still on myself. I don’t want to enter a relationship until he is ready, until he comes on his own and says, “I’m ready to stay and carry the relationship.” But now, unlike during those first month and a half, I feel him in my chest every day, through all the situations that happen during the day. 
Could it be than that these were his emotions at the begining of separation? I’m confused
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I get the throat chakra sensations too. Once it felt like I was being choked. Usually it’s a tingling or blocked feeling. I got the tingling when I saw him last month, like as I watched him walking past.
@Scorpio I do have issues with my mother who is very much on survival mode these days having lost her husband and mother recently. She’s very much focused on herself, her health etc and is getting surgery soon. I take her shopping every week and rarely does she ask how I’m doing or what’s going on in my life. She will waffle on for ages about people I don’t know and shows zero interest in me. It bothers me and drains my energy. So that could be related.
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Could very well be. As I said before, emotions don’t just disappear. They need an outlet to be expressed into. Be it music, writing, art, etc. 
Happening with me right now.
I feel like all the life energy is being sucked out of me. My life looks like it’s trying to stand still while facing a raging storm. I get irritated a lot, snap at everything and anything… mostly minor inconvenience that leaves people around me thinking.
I am DF, awakened. I have done a good bit of inner work and healing. I was a state of complete peace and contentment (the one you get when you have reached inner alignment). I was happy and life was good. I missed my twin but at least life was alright. I was teeming with positive energy.
But when my DM began awakening… I felt my world tumble down again… the world I had built so carefully. It’s agonizing. I feel random emotions. I want to cry, I even do but that doesn’t feel enough. I know it’s not mine and my twin’s. I even feel a bit mad about me having to feel this when it’s not mine. But at least I am happy that my twin is doing the work.
I hope for a peaceful day every morning. I hope for the betterment.
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Oh gosh I didn’t realise them awakening would shake up your life too. I thought the DFs would get a break. I have no idea what’s going on with my twin. I feel his emotions, anxiety etc. Last night I had tears spring in my eyes randomly. I try to just observe and send love. I hope he’s doing ok.
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That’s very similar to what is happening to me. I worked really hard on myself. I was happy and starting to build a life, but as I reached that level, I started feeling my twin again, and everything collapsed. Now I feel hurt and lost again. I don’t know if that’s my DM awakening, that never occurred to me, how do I know if it’s him or me?
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I think if you were really happy and felt complete before feeling your twin then you must have done a good bit of inner work. Considering that, the lost and hurt feelings might be your twin.
Look out for the signs that indicates that it might be your twin’s energy that you are picking. Just focus on yourself, time will heal everything (it sounds cliche, I know).
If it really is your twin’s energy, then you should be able to feel yourself in a few days. At least that’s what happens to me every time.
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I was crying every day and night for the first year and still a lot of pain the second year. It’s been over three years now and I’m doing a lot better. I don’t really cry that much anymore, and on the rare occasion it does happen, it’s usually really short and I get over it quickly.
It’s really hard, but it gets easier as time goes on.
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