Should you forgive yourself? If you cannot forgive your twin… then don’t forgive yourself, either. Because your twin is you… And you are them… that is the core concept of TFs… one soul, one energy, one frequency.
She told me the other night in my head cutting me off was the biggest regret of her life and she was sorry I felt it of course I told her id always love her no matter what as her emotions felt bad like she felt guilty I told her not to worry and sent her loving thoughts and energy next day she felt better I could feel it I told her theres nothing to forgive and that id always love her no matter what
Im doing it right now and Its really hard. The only way that works for me is to think of him as two people. I think of this broken person who just couldn’t cope. I am able to forgive him pretty easily and I Know I don’t want that broken man to come back into my life. The new version however is a different story. I can’t wait to meet that man and I am holding a place for him in my heart. Its insane. Im literally doing mental cartwheels trying to forgive the unforgivable.
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Cycles repeat, and it sounds like you’re trying to navigate a really tough situation. Forgiveness is a journey, and it’s okay to take your time figuring things out. The part about being with other woman is necessary for them to work through their Karmic cycles in order to come back to you, unfortunately its very painful to stand by and watch, but its necessary
Today, Nov 25th marks three years of them cutting me off/no contact. But I have to admit it is I who crossed their boundaries. I had a reunion with them and my false TF at the same time, which triggers my trauma response, causing me to be anxious (and other obvious mentally ill responses) creeping them off. I have since diagnosed with PTSD. But also, apparently my twin already had someone crushing on them and I believe is their current soulmate/karmic.
So forgiveness? I hope they’re the one forgiving me. Because ever since I got diagnosed with PTSD and a suspected ADHD (diagnosis after 25 makes them hard to discern with other disorders), I’ve been rethinking and trying to bring closure not only for my twin but everyone else in my life.
Couldn’t agree more. Anger was my last thing. My fingers were flying when I finally started journaling my rage. I actually felt guilty right after and then it was like magic the next day. Life has been amazing since then. In the way I think and in the world around me. Who Knew? lol
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There IS something to forgive. That’s literally the whole point of forgiveness. When we skip straight to ‘nothing to forgive,’ aren’t we just spiritually bypassing the actual hurt that happened?
I get the unconditional love piece. I really do. And I’m not saying your telepathic communication wasn’t real or meaningful. But forgiveness isn’t about pretending the boundary-crossing never mattered. It’s about acknowledging it DID matter, it DID hurt, and choosing to release the resentment anyway.
Saying ‘there’s nothing to forgive’ kind of… erases the impact? Like, she felt guilty for a reason. She cut you off and that caused pain. That’s real. You can absolutely still love her unconditionally AND acknowledge that what happened required forgiveness. Both things can exist at once. I think sometimes we’re so desperate to make our twins feel better (or to avoid conflict) that we minimize our own experience. ‘Don’t worry, it’s fine, there’s nothing to forgive’ - but your hurt was valid. Her apology suggests she knows she crossed a line. Maybe the real healing would’ve been ‘I forgive you’ instead of ‘there’s nothing to forgive.’
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Yeah I see where you are coming from, but at the same time since she did nothing intentionally to hurt me she was just most likely overpowered by the connection and got scared of engaging with me. I get yes she caused me pain but she never meant to which is what I meant with nothing to forgive. If she had been intentionally mean to me which she never was then that would be different but since she didnt mean to thats what I meant of course even causing pain to our twin accidentally is going to be something that once realised upsets them.
Thisssss. So much this.
The twin flame community can be sooooo quick to push forgiveness as the ‘enlightened’ thing to do, but you know what? Sometimes anger is the healthiest response you can have. It means you actually recognize that your boundaries mattered in the first place.
I spent monthssss trying to force myself into forgiveness because I thought that’s what would bring union faster. Spoiler: it didn’t work. All it did was make me suppress my actual feelings and pretend I was ‘healed’ when I was really just numb. Big difference. Trying to force yourself is just bypassing and ignoring the inner work that you are supposed to do.
Things got better when I finally let myself be mad. Like, properly furious. And once I stopped judging myself for feeling that way, the anger actually moved through me instead of staying stuck. You don’t owe anyone (even your twin) forgiveness on their timeline. Especially not if they haven’t even acknowledged what they did or shown any real change. Honor where you’re at right now, because that’s the only way through.
My experience anyway.
I would think if you can’t forgive them, then they weren’t really your twin flame… more like a Karmic. So many people seem angry about it, sometimes like “there is only forgiveness” but still using the TF name. No way. You don’t understand.
You don’t get that choice. If they are your twin flame you are going to forgive them.
Forgiveness takes time. A woman who loves herself first has mastered her shadows. She doesn’t fear, she creates. She creates a safe space for him. A refuge.
When the time is right, you can forgive them everything. This comes just automatically. There comes a point where your heart is free and open, and there is no more anger about the past time or what they did, you can understand that all was important for him to learn and to bring him back to you.
Forgiveness is not for the other party, it’s for yourself, so you can let go of the emotion(s) that go with it.
So yes, you should forgive them.
However, that doesn’t mean that you should also forget about it all. That’s not the same thing. Protecting & honouring your boundaries is also something you do for yourself. It’s called self-love. And especially in the TF journey, that is what it’s all about!
When all is what you hoped for right now…let the past be the past. But only if you feel that he is genuinly changed for himself and your journey.
This ‘two people’ perspective you’re describing is actually deep mirror work without you maybe even realizing it. That broken version of him you’re forgiving? He’s triggering and reflecting back the broken parts of yourself that you’re also learning to have compassion for. And that healed version you’re holding space for? That mirrors the version of YOU that you’re actively becoming through this process.
What triggers us most about their behavior during separation is usually pointing directly at our own unhealed wounds. His inability to cope was probably mirroring places where you also struggle to cope with overwhelming emotions. When we can see our twin as a mirror rather than just the source of our pain, forgiveness becomes less about excusing what they did and more about integrating and healing those shadow parts within ourselves.
The mental cartwheels make total sense because you’re essentially doing the inner work of forgiving parts of yourself through forgiving him. That’s why it feels so complicated - it’s never just about them. Keep going with this approach, it sounds like you’re making real progress even if it doesn’t feel linear.
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