We’re all here for you 
Y’know what hit me recently? This doesn’t need to make sense to anyone else. Like at all. It’s between me and my TF, period.
I love this place because we all understand parts of the journey, but we all experience the path differently so we’ll never completley understand.
I’m lucky enough to have found a couple people who get it (my brother actually knows about this stuff which helps), but even when I couldn’t talk to anyone, the experience was still real and still mine. Nobody needs to validate what you’re going through for it to matter.
If you ever need someone to vent to, my DMs are open. Try to find the beauty in it even when it’s hard.
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The loneliness gives you a chance to actually reach surrender and do the inner work. If you didn’t feel anything, then you wouldn’t be on the journey. There would be nothing to drive you forward to heal and be ready for what comes next.
It is lonely but it is also a gift:
The ancestral healing piece is what gets me. We’re not just processing our own stuff but patterns that go back generations.
That’s isolating in a way that’s hard to explain to anyone.
Even when friends are genuinely amazed by the synchronicities, they still don’t really get it? Mine have been mind blown by specific things between my TF and me, but there’s this gap between intellectual curiosity and actually understanding what you’re carrying.
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I had that experince with a close friend once. She was listening but said herself she is amazed especially by the syncs I told her about. But she also said she does not carry the feelings I do. Not the depth anyway. So yes, it seems to be pretty lonely though.
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The isolation pushed me to start a private journal where I write directly to the connection without filtering or translating for anyone. That one space where I don’t have to perform normalcy matters a lot.
Having somewhere the full truth exists makes carrying it everywhere else slightly less crushing.
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Something that sits with me about this - the masculine often experiences this exact same isolation but without any framework or language for it. They rarely seek out spaces like this one or have words to describe what’s moving through them. Their awakening tends to unfold in complete solitude, processing intense feelings with zero context or validation.
At least we found each other here and can name what’s happening. They’re usually carrying the same weight entirely alone. That thought honestly keeps me softer toward mine during the hard moments.
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I felt very lucky initially that I have a couple of friends who are willing to understand, but recently realised I can’t tell them anymore about it as they don’t truly get it. They act like I have conscious choice over it all, which I’m still working on (I now feel I think about him 23/7 which is an improvement!) Even my friend who is getting more spiritual and my mum also, don’t understand. They are walking a more conscious path into spiritualism whereas they can’t comprehend how forcefully I was thrown into it. I feel like they have made a conscious decision to take the red pill, where as someone put it in a drink and I had no idea I was taking it!
It’s feeling lonlier now, but I’m feeling ok with that as I feel I don’t have to explain the crazy stuff anymore and convince others of my journey, which was getting exhausting. Thank goodness for this space to be able to voice things about the journey knowing you all understand.
I find it difficult to talk to friends about it..My TF and I went through a really hard time that led to our separating and him taking a step back (he’s the runner). It really shattered me and I’ve been feeling so broken. When I have those bad days and open up to my friends about it, I’m told things like “Don’t let him occupy your mind anymore, he’s not worth your time!"
I know they mean well…but ultimately, they weren’t in the relationship and they have no idea the depth of the bond my TF and I had. At times, I just feel like no one understands.
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