Twin flame ghosting

It amazes me how someone, in general, can ghost you. I understand the fear, but can they not understand basic human decency? At least tell me that you need space.

I’m at a point in my journey at which I lost sight of things. My twin ghosted me several months ago, right after telling me everything was alright and that he wanted to keep talking. I used that time to focus on myself, I worked on my attachment, rebuilt my life… all that you are supposed to do, now what? I know in my heart I’m ready, and if I’m ready, he’s supposed to be ready around the same time because of the mirror theory, is it not?

I just cannot get my head around what’s happening. What experiences have you had with ghosting? And have you got out of it?

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I can’t even count the number of times my Twin has ghosted me. There was periods that lasted one or two weeks, one to two months, five months, and the longest being 10 months which I genuinely believed then that it was over and I’d never hear from him again. I completely empathise with you. Why is it so hard to verbalise, “I need some time by myself for a little while” as opposed so just disappearing.

It hurts a lot, but rerouting the focus back to yourself instead of wondering why and if they will return will help. A lot easier said than done, I know. Also, when I was going through the period of ghosting and someone told me this, I genuinely rolled my eyes because how many times have we heard this being said? It doesn’t take away the pain

But now, from where I am, I truly believe you cannot ruin what is meant for you and they do come back. Sometimes it just takes longer than we think it will. Giving them space and focusing on the little things in your life that make you happy changes the vibration between you. And when you least expect it, boom. They will appear :heart:

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Thank you so much for the advice but I came to a different conclusion. I already did what you mentioned and I ended up at the starting point, which pained me after all the work that I put.

There are different types of surrender, as each twin and each journey is different. I already tried the type of surrendering you’re mentioning and it didn’t work for me. Now I’m trying surrendering to my own power, boundaries and worth. Standing up and saying, “these are my terms, and I am no longer playing the waiting game” is its own form of release.

It may sound different than what we’re used to but it’s what feels right to me right now, hope it gives me peace.

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Couldn’t agree with you more, and that’s exactly what I did too. I think for me, it was more a case of. I will always love him, but I also don’t need him to be complete or happy. And at the moment I was living my fullest life, he reappeared. We’re not in union, far from it, but our connection now is possibly the most peaceful it has ever been, and I’m grateful for each moment of warmth we are able to share with each other. The journey has still a long way to go, but for the first time, I no longer want to know what will happen next nor am I anxious when he goes quiet. There is peace in the knowing that no matter what happens, our connection can never be severed. He will always be a part of me, and I a part of him :heart:

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What my TF done, maybe is the most common things what men do when they want to end a relationship, but doesn’t want to said the word first. He still act like we’re okay, but gone missing a lot. He pulled away, not initiate contact first, getting cold and not engaging in conversation, or engaging but in a very curt manner. He could let me hanging for weeks without communication. He could talks, laugh and joke to all people but me.

Then, when I ask for direction, he feel cornered and said that there’ll be no possibility for us to be together, that he want to be just friend, and feel comfortable like that. But, he want the intimacy. When I put a boundary, he ghosted me. Well, they’re acts of ghosting after all.

Then, he come back, communicate like nothing’s going wrong. I have high hope again and he behave the same.

Haven’t been talking to him for 2 years. I think it’s done deal, just try to living the best I could for now.

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Totally hear you on this. It’s so frustrating. I guess the DM gets overwhelmed and doesn’t know how to articulate it all, so goes silent and before you know it, it’s been too long for them to suddenly contact with an excuse?

Mine just 2 weeks ago arranged to meet me for a coffee and cancelled on me an hour prior with an excuse that, while I believe is true, is something he could have worked around. However, it proved to me that he knew I mean more to him as he easily could have met me and worked around the issue, but I feel he got overwhelmed and anxious so used it as a hood excuse and it would always have been something. And now, I wait. Again!

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Don’t wait. Just don’t wait.

Live your life as best as it could, there would be bad days, there would be ‘can’t be better’ days.

I wait, half of me believe that my life isn’t stopping just because I wait. But, actually a lot of my decision about my life still revolving around that ‘waiting’ situation that I refuse to acknowledge.

And, our life will stay revolved around him without we realize it.

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The basic decency thing gets me too. Just saying “I need time” would make it so much less painful but runners are often in such deep soul shock they can’t even explain it to themselves, let alone you. They feel everything you do, but amplified by panic, so they… shut down.

He probably meant it when he said everything was alright. Then it all caught up and his system just ejected. I’ve heard runners say it felt like something physically stopping them from reaching out. The mirror thing trips people up because ready doesn’t always line up in real time. You can be ready at soul level while he’s reflecting it through resistance. Same wound, different reaction.

Sending love, you’re not crazy for feeling frustrated.

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They come back. That’s just the pattern, especially with your zodiac compatibility.

Right now they’re probably triggered beyond belief, in so much emotional pain that ghosting feels like the only option. It could be mental health stuff, or they can’t even articulate why they cut contact in the first place.

Sorry, wait is probably not the whole story. I mean we shall see if he tries to rearrange. In the meantime,I have events coming up, I’m looking to start a course to change career, I’m changing gyms (he works in my current gym) etc. I’m not sat still watching my phone, however I do feel like I’m also keeping one eye on what he’s doing. I’m hoping that will lessen over time.

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Time doesn’t move the same on the spiritual side as it does in 3D. You can both be facing the same wound, but he’s handling it through avoidance while you’ve been doing the active healing. You’re reflecting the same fear or abandonment pattern, he’s just using the strategy that feels safer to him right now.

Free will is the part that gets left out. Your attachment styles can be total opposites even while you’re mirroring each other. One runs, one stays open. That’s still the mirror at work.

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Been through the whole running away thing myself, even made major life decisions just to avoid dealing with it all.

Whatever triggers your deepest abandonment wounds is the point, it’s there so you can actually process and release that stuff. Without that intense pull reminding us what we’re working toward, we’d probably all just walk away and never look back.

It makes complete sense and no sense at all. Your heart knows exactly why he did it, but your brain can’t connect the pieces, so you just keep spinning.

If you’re hurting this deeply, he has to be too. And yet somehow he still won’t fix it for either of you.

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Okay so hear me out. Maybe ghosting is the universe’s way of protecting you. I’ve been reading that divine timing sometimes needs that quiet stretch to work through karmic stuff from past lives. It kind of tracks the more I think about it.

The more I think about my own situation, the less it feels like his choice at all. Has anyone else looked at it this way? Just curious.

At the moment I have my Twin blocked on social media, which has kind of turned into a form of mutual ghosting.

From my perspective, though, I did have a reason for the blocking:

I felt poorly treated, and at first I only unfriended him in social media because I felt he hadn’t been very friendly towards me, when meeting in 3D. That alone would actually have been enough for me.

But then he tagged me in a post along with many other people, including three energies I really didn’t want to be involved with and that felt very uncomfortabel for me. In order to remove myself from that energetic involvement, I blocked him, because it seemed like the quickest and easiest way to get my energy out of that situation.

Sure, I could have simply asked him to remove the tag, but because things had already gone badly and because we’ve never actually talked openly about the connection, blocking felt like the simplest solution for me at the time :woman_shrugging:

Looking back, maybe it wasn’t handled in the best way, and I feel that’s a bit sad. He also never asked me why I blocked him either. It’s been like this for about two months now. He’s not blocked on WhatsApp, and I can see that he watches my status posts whenever I share something there, but we didn’t talk since then.

At the same time, during this period I kept being shown videos on YouTube talking about how, at some stage, the DF is meant to focus on themselves. I even saw one video where a woman said that for some DFs it can be necessary to block the DM for a while in order to stop constantly sending chasing energy.

So I don’t know… maybe blocking him was actually the right decision.:woman_shrugging:

Sometimes I regret it a little, but the energetic and telepathic connection is still activ in the background.

I blocked him as well to work on myself, as you said. It depends on each journey, for me, I needed to block him at the beginning so I could get him out of my system. After a month, the out of sight, out of mind, started to feel heavy. I unblocked him on whatsapp, some weeks later on instagram and I did the hardest thing, learn to live without him while his presence was there, that’s where I’m right now.

Btw, I remember when you posted about meeting him, I cannot believe 2 months went by.

@Carmen

Thank you very much for your message :blush:

Yes, it really has been about two months already, and I’m honestly a little surprised myself that I’ve managed to keep him blocked for this long.

The first few days were the strangest, because before that I could see his posts almost daily, or at least every few days, multiple times a week, especially the music posts (you know, the whole communication-through-lyrics thing). Then suddenly all of that was gone.

I kind of did get, a little bit better, used to it though, and for a while I was actually coping with it much better.

So, many weeks later, things have settled down a bit. Everything feels a bit more neutral, or at least the emotions about the meeting have had some time to settle.

A few weeks ago, the telepathic/energetic connection seemed to become stronger again — or perhaps I was simply able to perceive it more clearly, because I actually think the energetic connection is always there, but maybe I go through phases when I can feel it more strongly or clearly than at other times.

Then one day, completely out of nowhere, I suddenly had an incredibly strong urge to unblock him on social media.

The feeling appeared instantly and was surprisingly intense. I spent some time going back and forth about it because it felt so strong.

I ended up messaging my best friend, who is really the only person I can openly talk to about this connection. She didn’t reply immediately because she was busy. While I was waiting for her response, I suddenly had an insight.

I realized that pretty sure this urge to unblock him wasn’t coming entirely from myself. As I said, the telepathic and energetic connection felt particularly strong during those days, and all at once it occurred to me that this powerful, sudden impulse might not have been solely my own desire. It felt more like something he wanted.

Once I had that realization, I became very clear about one thing: no, I’m not going to do it right now.

Because if I did, nothing would actually change. The connection would still remain unspoken, nothing would be addressed, and we’d simply continue going in the same circles.

When my friend finally replied, she said, “If you’re feeling that impulse and it feels like your intuition, then I’d suggest unblocking him.”

But by then I had already reached my own conclusion. I told her that I no longer felt it was purely my intuition. Instead, I felt it might have been something he was communicating telepathically (perhaps unconsciously :woman_shrugging:). And for me, acting on that impulse wouldn’t have been the right path, because it would simply sweep everything under the rug without resolving anything- and additionally:

If I unblocked him without talking before, I would again be energetically connected to these energies in his posting-which was the reason for the blocking in the first place.

So for now I’ve made a decision, even though it’s not always easy:

I will only unblock him once we’ve actually acknowledged and talked about the connection. In other words, only once something has changed rather than us continuing the same cycle.

One small thought to finish with:
I’ve spent a lot of time talking about what was my intuition, what he may have sent me telepathically, and whether that urge actually came from him…
But if we assume that Twin Flames truly are the same soul, and perhaps even share the same Higher Self, then the question would be: can I really separate it like that?
Can I truly say, “this came from him” and “that came from me”?
Or is it like the same thing? One energetic system?
Maybe the more accurate way to put it would be: it came from us?
I honestly don’t know. It’s all very complicated :woman_shrugging:

I’m guessing that you have the chance of seeing him in person, because if not, if he’s blocked, it’s impossible to talk otherwise. I don’t really have that option, I can only contact him through the phone, and I know he won’t answer, so I’m trying to find him in person, but it’s not easy.

You said you wanted something to change, I don’t know your situation in dept, but you can be that something. He’s just one part of two, you can change as well. You’re a piece of the cycle; if you change, the situation is already different because you are. Even if he’s the same, you’ll perceive and manage it differently.

I think focusing on yourself doesn’t just mean doing your work, but also means stopping the “he’s ready, he’s not ready, he has to do this or stop doing that” thinking. Even if we share energies, forget about him and embrace your power, what do you want, what do you need.
You want to talk, then go talk, I cannot promise you it’ll turn out the way you want, but you did something. If you wait until the situation is right, you might be waiting forever. There’s a threat about how not doing something might keep us trapped: “Divine Timing” for Twin Flames Might Be Keeping You Trapped.

This is just my opinion, you can see things different, every journey is unique.

That is something that I do, too. Work on myself, try new things, building my dream, seeing therapist. But, deep down I wait for him to change his mind, to rearrange his life, to realize everything.

It’s like I understand the theories, understand what should I do for myself. But, I’m not truly letting him go. I still hold on the hope that he’ll change, that the situation will change.

But, that’s me, okay..

Everybody’s different. I just wish that nobody get stuck like I do.

My twin ghosted me back in 2021 after a really intense conversation similar to yours. My biggest regret was breaking no contact three weeks in with a “just checking on you” text that got left on read for 11 days. That second wave of silence hurt ten times worse than the original ghosting because I had handed my power away again.

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