Question is in the title.
Mine has done some extremely confused and confusing things, including reporting me at work (was it a test to see what I would say/do in response, trying to create healing distance because I was chasing, just trying to make out he disliked me to everyone else, or any/all of the above?)
My runner once blocked me on literally everything (phone, socials, email) and then showed up at a coffee shop he knew I go to every Saturday. Just sat there pretending he didnāt see me, didnāt say a word, left after 20 minutes. Two days later he unblocked me on IG but still didnāt message.
When Iāve asked him now, he doesnāt know how to explain that.
Thanks for responding to my post. That must have been really hard to get your head around.
Iāve read a lot of comments from other twins on different forums and platforms saying their twin did these types of things and they werenāt able to explain why later when asked about it.
Thinking about it, guess it could be a combination of intense fear but knowing they also feel connected to us and want to be near us on their own terms. It just comes out looking odd because they canāt handle what theyāre going through at the time.
I really feel for my twin and itās so hard not to jump into fixer mode to comfort him (which is what got me into the position of him reporting me in the first place). I didnāt mean any harm and work realised that in the end, thank God. Realisation dawned just in time that I should continue treating the connection as still being in separation. Fixer mode is a wound I have to work on.
I think there are many odd things that my runner has done. But this one is the most prominent:
So me and my twin were in separation that time (but in talking terms). One day he randomly texted me and out of nowhere he mentioned his best friend (whom I know well) and said that he has a crush on me!
My runner mentioned that his best friend has caught feelings for me and I should probably give him a chance! But when I denied it, he said it was simply just a prank!
And this incident kept me in wonders for months after that. And to this date, his intentions remains really vague for. But I felt like it had something to do with his ego.
What did he wanted to do?
Thanks for responding. That out of nowhere action must have been a real mystery and I can understand why you were left wondering about what his intentions were. Sometimes it can feel like thereās no rhyme or reason to what they do.
Iām sorry these confusing things have happened to us, but at the same time itās sort of good to know weāre not alone.
She acted like I was the enemy called me selfish but my freinds told me she would constantly ask about me and when I wasnt around ask where I was at first her eyes told me her true feelings we had a wfew arguments like a couple even before we really were meant to know eachother its like we already did
Mine deleted all his socials for 24 hours then a month later he removed me from Facebook. At that point I messaged him as we had been in separation for 3 months. He messaged back and weāve been talking ever since. We are even meeting up next week. Heās still giving mixed signals he said wonāt it be awkward meeting as the attract will still be there?? Not sure what that means but weāll see!
When a runner pulls workplace or HR moves, treat it as a safety and stability issue. Document everything. Keep communication neutral and written when possible. Protect your job and your mental health.
Pay attention to whether this pattern shows up elsewhere, like public image management or triangulation, or going through āofficial channelsā instead of just talking. That can signal someone who is deeply dysregulated and trying to control their fear by working through systems.
You can honor the connection and still set a hard boundary. Something like, āI wonāt engage in anything that risks my livelihood.ā Thatās grounding it in reality.
Thank you. Yes, after they pulled that, I ceased all communication except absolutely necessary professional emails and keep my boss copied in on all of them. I agree with the deeply dysregulated part. Heās like a loose cannon at times, and not just with me. His fear and ego are both very strong. Sad but, like you said, Iām not risking my job and grounding is most definitely needed.
Honestly the oddest thing. My runner showed up at the exact park bench we last sat on together. Didnāt say a word to me.
The oddest thing my Twin is doing right now is obsessively checking my Instagram stories, but has not reached out directly. Even tho he knows we are in the same country right now, and for the first time in 2 years have the rare opportunity to see each other face to face, heās kept the distance. Iām honestly so done with his behaviour
Kept āaccidentallyā butt dialing me from their pocket. Modern phones donāt do that and nobody else around us had the same problem but I would see him call and then could hear his pocket basically and his muffled voice in the background.
They reached out from the blue to tell me they needed space. Umā¦ okay. You were in no-contact what more space could you possilby want weirdo?
So perfectly contradictory.
Thatās the kind of thing that only makes sense from the view of a runner whoās thinking about you constantly and needs to feel some sense of control over the situation. By reaching out to āask for spaceā they got to make the silence feel like their decision rather than just something that was happening. Itās more about managing their own anxiety around the connection. They almost needed to convince themselves, not you, that the distance was intentional. A lot of the stories in this thread follow that same pattern.
Runners do things that logically contradict themselves, but emotionally make perfect sense once you realize theyāre trying to wrestle back a feeling of agency over something that feels bigger than them.
He comes back every time I reach that centered place. Every single time.
Finding peace within yourself and knowing youāre already whole without the connection, thatās really the way forward. Took me a while to actually believe that and not just say it.