I felt my twin even before meeting him. I always felt a presence without a face, since I met him, that presence became him. I think it was always him, I just didn’t know. But we’re now in separation, I stopped feeling that presence after years of being with me, and it felt really weird. And what’s worse, now I feel it again, but I have to pretend I don’t and surrender to myself, and that hurts the most.
God, this is the part that just grinds you down. My DM is dating someone else, and not casually either, like genuinely involved with this person.
And I still think about them constantly. Every day. Almost all day. Which just makes the whole thing so much more crushing.
Yes but sometimes I am not if I am not thinking of her with my mind I am feeling her energy around me 24.7
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The unawakened twin thinks about them just as much. The runner still thinks about the chaser. Maybe more. But it shows up differently, this obsessive curiosity about why they’re so electrifying, picking apart every word they said, trying to solve them like some kind of puzzle while being terrified they might catch on to how you feel.
Before my awakening it was this weird mix of physical attraction I couldn’t explain and just… knowing there was something almost mystical about them. That combination drove me crazy. Like having an embarrassing crush on someone you know you shouldn’t want.
After awakening, all that mental chaos dissolved into pure love. Everything finally made sense.
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Those small digital check-ins during separation matter more than people say. Like you’re both reaching for each other at the exact same time without saying a word, and somehow it just lands.
Almost like an unspoken language you didn’t agree on but both fluently speak. Sounds weird when you type it out, but here we are.
Trust whatever’s overseeing this connection. Full stop. It doesn’t matter if you’re chaser or runner. Both twins feel this same intensity, one just might not have consciously caught up yet.
All those emotions you’re cycling through, the longing and confusion, the frustration that makes you want to scream, that’s what’s needed for the masculine to awaken and for things to actually move forward.
Focus on yourself. That’s the real work anyway.
I have been reading posts on here since my last and most horrible seperation. Just needed to see if anyone was as miserable as me. What a shock that was. I feel the pain so I get on here in small doses. This kind of thing hurts me the most. The thought of mine with someone else is just too much for me to even think about. I know it’s a distinct possibility. But I love myself too much to ever look at his social media. I know he has tried to find me out there but he already knew I wasn’t really on social media at all. It makes me laugh though because I have gotten several readings saying he is trying to find me out there. I get password re-sets all the time and I know it’s him trying to see what’s up. What I don’t understand is why anyone would deliberately torture themselves. We all have zero control over this agony. So why add more to what is already the hardest thing you will probably ever do?
25 days NC here. The pattern you’re describing is exactly my experience. Those blocks where I’m genuinely not thinking about him feel like little victories. Then out of nowhere I’m three posts deep on his socials without even realizing I picked up my phone.
If we’re feeling this pull so strongly, they must be too. That’s kind of the whole point of this connection. I really do believe he’s thinking about me even when I can’t see proof of it. The intensity has to go both ways. It just has to.
Even on days the mind behaves itself, the body just doesn’t forget.
I think so… I know he is always on my mind, even if it’s just in the background of my thoughts and occasionally coming up to the forefront.
I was given a message from his higher self in the form of an un-bodied voice recently in a dream, saying, “He is always thinking of you, you’re always on his mind.”
This was after telling me, “I’m always with you, whether you’re happy, hurting, or bored. You’re never alone.”
I believe this is the same for all twin flames. It certainly gave me much needed comfort, and I hope it’ll give you comfort as well 
It has been very enlightening reading all your insights. You know, I often have questioned myself about this. I, personally, haven’t got any confirmation from the other side—and lucky the ones that already have that validation—however I have read somewhere else about this and it always stayed with me. Someone compared it to a song playing constantly in the background, which sometimes you hear it very LOUD, and others it’s barely there. To me it has been this way for three years. There is not a single day where I am not conscious of him. And I think this is the perfect metaphor to describe it.
It’s also not even ‘thinking’ about them. It’s more like being conscious of them. Do I make myself clear? Has anybody else thought about this? It’s like you are AWARE of them. In the past, I have reflected a lot about this— with other connections, I felt it was more like the thoughts were self inflicted even if I wasn’t aware. I kept going on a loop, wondering what they were doing, imagining scenarios in my head etc., but the nature of this kind of connection is quite different and it’s hard to put it into words. I’m pretty sure many people here will understand. I’m also very confident if this is a true 'TF connection’, it’s mutual through and through, but the way runners filter and deal with the energy of the connection might be different than chasers and follow a different timeline. So I guess it depends where they are on their journey.
@Nana, I absolutey agree, this metaphor is so true. He is there like a constant hum in the background. Always. Only varying in volume. And it indeed can stay like that for years when you are in no contact. Sometimes it goes from a hum to intensely feeling his energy around.
What adds to the difficulty is that often you don’t have anybody to share this with, as people won’t understand. This is so different to what happens in “normal” relationships or soulmate connections.
I would really like to hear more from runners how they experience this. Any runners here who can describe if it’s similar for them?
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