I felt my twin even before meeting him. I always felt a presence without a face, since I met him, that presence became him. I think it was always him, I just didn’t know. But we’re now in separation, I stopped feeling that presence after years of being with me, and it felt really weird. And what’s worse, now I feel it again, but I have to pretend I don’t and surrender to myself, and that hurts the most.
God, this is the part that just grinds you down. My DM is dating someone else, and not casually either, like genuinely involved with this person.
And I still think about them constantly. Every day. Almost all day. Which just makes the whole thing so much more crushing.
Yes but sometimes I am not if I am not thinking of her with my mind I am feeling her energy around me 24.7
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The unawakened twin thinks about them just as much. The runner still thinks about the chaser. Maybe more. But it shows up differently, this obsessive curiosity about why they’re so electrifying, picking apart every word they said, trying to solve them like some kind of puzzle while being terrified they might catch on to how you feel.
Before my awakening it was this weird mix of physical attraction I couldn’t explain and just… knowing there was something almost mystical about them. That combination drove me crazy. Like having an embarrassing crush on someone you know you shouldn’t want.
After awakening, all that mental chaos dissolved into pure love. Everything finally made sense.
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Those small digital check-ins during separation matter more than people say. Like you’re both reaching for each other at the exact same time without saying a word, and somehow it just lands.
Almost like an unspoken language you didn’t agree on but both fluently speak. Sounds weird when you type it out, but here we are.
Trust whatever’s overseeing this connection. Full stop. It doesn’t matter if you’re chaser or runner. Both twins feel this same intensity, one just might not have consciously caught up yet.
All those emotions you’re cycling through, the longing and confusion, the frustration that makes you want to scream, that’s what’s needed for the masculine to awaken and for things to actually move forward.
Focus on yourself. That’s the real work anyway.
I have been reading posts on here since my last and most horrible seperation. Just needed to see if anyone was as miserable as me. What a shock that was. I feel the pain so I get on here in small doses. This kind of thing hurts me the most. The thought of mine with someone else is just too much for me to even think about. I know it’s a distinct possibility. But I love myself too much to ever look at his social media. I know he has tried to find me out there but he already knew I wasn’t really on social media at all. It makes me laugh though because I have gotten several readings saying he is trying to find me out there. I get password re-sets all the time and I know it’s him trying to see what’s up. What I don’t understand is why anyone would deliberately torture themselves. We all have zero control over this agony. So why add more to what is already the hardest thing you will probably ever do?
25 days NC here. The pattern you’re describing is exactly my experience. Those blocks where I’m genuinely not thinking about him feel like little victories. Then out of nowhere I’m three posts deep on his socials without even realizing I picked up my phone.
If we’re feeling this pull so strongly, they must be too. That’s kind of the whole point of this connection. I really do believe he’s thinking about me even when I can’t see proof of it. The intensity has to go both ways. It just has to.