YES. This drives me crazy.
The concept goes back centuries and seems to play out in different ways for different people with deep spiritual origins. And yeah, on the other end, you get people slapping the TF label on any intense crush they have.
Neither extreme helps. Each connection is unique - the synchronicities, that feeling of recognition, the mirroring. Your soul knows what’s happening even when your conscious mind is trying to make checklists or get validation from others. The gatekeeping comes from insecurity. If someone questions their connection, they get defensive. If someone else claims a connection, they feel threatened. As you said, misery loves company.
I’ve stepped back from a lot of the bigger online groups for this exact reason. There’s pressure to fit into a specific box and anyone who doesn’t gets attacked.