I don’t really know how to say this one so I’m just going to blurt… I think I hate my twin flame… and I don’t know if that means they’re not really my TF and I’ve been chasing a karmic.
This morning I had actual hate for him burning in my chest. Never felt that before. I keep getting these feelings about what he’s doing, and they’re always right, which pisses me off more. Meanwhile, he’s out there living like I was nothing. The fucked up part is even while I’m this angry, I can still feel our connection. I still feel his presence.
I’m tired of going between loving him and wanting to delete every trace of him. Is it really possible to hate your twin flame?
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Let me be one of the first ones to tell you that feeling hatred towards your twin flame does happen at times and might even be quite healthy.
Conflict is inevitable in any relationship, be it a twin flame one or otherwise. It’s how that conflict is resolved that makes the difference between a strong and healthy relationship, and a toxic and abusive one.
I can’t tell you how many times, I’ve outright lost my shit over my own twin flame’s “slutty” behaviour, over the past 2 years, so I know exactly where you’re coming from.
I mean, alright, I understand that emotional connection is about as essential to a woman as drinking water, and being in an emotionally neglectful or abusive relationship isn’t pleasant, but I still cannot condone the cheating, and pregnancies (multiple) that resulted from their unfaithful behaviour.
That being said, context does matter! We shouldn’t jump to conclusions or make judgements until we trully understand why someone behaves the way they do. Be it as a result of fear, love, or other emotions.
Remember, in your twin flame’s mind, their behaviour may be perfectly fine and acceptable. They may not see the bigger picture, or realize the implications and consequences of their actions.
Its always best to approch situations with an “innocent until proven guilty” mentality.
Yeah, you can absolutely hate them. And I mean really hate them, not the spiritual-reframing “it’s not hate, it’s just triggering” version that gets thrown around. It doesn’t just happen, I would hazard a guess and say it can be pretty common.
I’ve seen people describe real, genuine hate.
The anger usually gets worse during separation because you’re both sending energy back and forth without realizing it. You feel rage, which transfers to them, they get hostile about it, send it back to you - just keeps cycling. Some people report their twin actually reaching out to say they’ve been feeling suffocating, angry energy, so what you’re picking up on might be legit telepathic stuff, might be your intuition, might be both.
The opposite of love isn’t hate… it is absolutely apathy.
The separation phase can last years. Sometimes it’s permanent in this lifetime. The community acts like everyone reunites if you just do enough shadow work, but that’s not guaranteed. And if this connection is making you lose yourself rather than find yourself, that’s a problem regardless of what label we put on it.
The fact that you’re questioning if they’re karmic instead is actually healthy. Real twin flames facilitate growth even through hell. Karmics keep you stuck in the same toxic loop.
I’m not going to tell you to “send them love and light” because that feels impossible when you genuinely hate someone… even if you also love them.
It isn’t always possible, and I’ve been there (I’m sure many of us have). The push-pullis brutal, and it doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you or the connection. You absolutely can hate them at points. They can hate you, too. In fact, when twin flames first meet, it’s not always instant sparks of love. Sometimes that energy comes out as hate and the first meeting is very far from romance.
Hating them doesn’t mean they’re not your twin flame. Doesn’t mean they are either.
In fact (before I forget), there was a TV show called Beef with two characters who hated each other, and I laughed so hard when one of the characters literally mentioned the idea of “twin flames” because they were trying to explain why they hated this person so much. Definitely not a twin flame show though… Nothing about that connection was healthy.
The thing is every emotion gets amplified in twin flame connections. Regular relationship anger becomes rage. Regular missing someone becomes can’t-get-out-of-bed depression. The same intensity that makes the highs incredible makes the lows feel like they’re going to kill you. You’re not crazy for feeling contradictory things simultaneously.
The knowing what they’re doing is interesting though. Could be your intuition working overtime, could be actual telepathic bleed-through since you share the same frequency. Twin flames have that energetic cord… whether you want it or not. During my worst separation phases, I’d get random hits of information that later turned out accurate - their emotional state, who they were with, sometimes even specific locations. It pissed me off more because I didn’t want to be connected to someone I was so angry at.
But here’s the real question: is this anger moving you forward or keeping you frozen? Because if it’s the second one, you might need to reassess. Not every intense connection is meant to last forever in physical form.
They probably aren’t doing as great as it looks - runners typically (almost always) think about their twin constantly while acting like they’ve moved on completely. They’re running from themselves, not from you, but that doesn’t make it hurt less when you’re the one left dealing with all the feelings they’re avoiding.
Your mirror soul will bring up shadows but you both actually heal and grow from them. Karmics bring up shadows and you just stay stuck in low vibration patterns. Twin flames feel safe even when they’re painful - like you can be fully yourself. Karmics make you walk on eggshells. Twin flames are reciprocal, both people feel it. Karmics are often an one-sided obsession.
If after months or years they’re still doing the same shit, not growing, not coming back, not even acknowledging the connection? That’s usually karmic. The universe isn’t this cruel - it won’t trap you with someone who makes you miserable forever just for “spiritual growth.” Sometimes the lesson is learning to walk away from what’s destroying you.
You’re allowed to feel however you feel right now. Hatred included.
I went through something similar where I was convinced I hated my twin, like, genuinely believed it for months. The anger was real, the resentment was real, that burning in your chest was just as real. I spent like 8 months alternating between wanting to never hear from them again and sensing exactly when they were thinking about me.
Underneath all that fire, there was something else that never disappeared. Even when I was at my angriest, even when I wanted to burn every bridge, there was this foundation that wouldn’t budge. It’s like trying to hate part of yourself - you can be furious at it, disgusted by it, want to cut it off, but it’s still there.
Real hate doesn’t coexist with feeling someone’s presence. You’re probably experiencing intense hurt and rage on top of a connection that’s still very much alive. It might be even more frustrating to hear because at least if it were actual hate, you could potentially walk away clean.
So I don’t think you can truly hate your twin flame, but you can be hurt and enraged enough that it feels indistinguishable from hate.
You’re still holding onto how you think this should be going and who he should be for you. The rage, the exhaustion from the back-and-forth - you’re attached to a specific outcome with a specific person. When reality doesn’t match that picture in your head, it creates this volcanic, angry reaction.
Let yourself feel these waves without making them mean something permanent about your connection. Get it out, write until your hand cramps, scream into a pillow, whatever. But then practice releasing your grip on how this is ‘supposed’ to look.
The fact that you can feel the connection even through the hate tells you something. This isn’t about whether he’s your twin or not. You’re learning to unhook from needing him to show up a certain way for your experience to be valid.
The opposite of hate is love. Maybe what you actually hate about him is something you need to work on. Im flying blind like a lot of people so I mostly dig into what I feel because that is the only certainty I have at this point. Giving up is so much easier than trying to reach that happy ending. Both choices are okay though. I pray for all of us all the time. It’s hard being on here and being aware of everyone’s pain knowing exactly how they feel. Sometimes I think that it has to be this hard. Complete unconditional love and contentment doesn’t come handed to us on a silver platter.
God, yes. I’ve been exactly where you are right now.
The hatred isn’t actually about your twin. I know, I know, it feels like it is. When I was in the thick of it, I would’ve fought anyone who suggested my rage wasn’t 100% justified and aimed squarely at him. But I started noticing something weird. The intensity of my hatred would spike right when certain old wounds got triggered. Stuff I thought I’d dealt with years ago. Stuff I didn’t even realize was still sitting there, festering.
The hatred was easier, I guess? Safer than looking at what was going on inside me.
Because if I focused all that energy on hating him, I didn’t have to feel the other stuff. The stuff that hurt worse. What messed me up was that regular guys didn’t trigger this in me. They couldn’t reach deep enough to hit those buttons. Only he could somehow access that level, which made me hate him even MORE at first - like, why does HE get to be the one who makes me feel this insane? I’m not saying your anger isn’t real or valid. Feel it. Let yourself be furious. But maybe there’s something underneath it too. Still hate him some days, if I’m being honest.
I hear you, that burning hatred is real and it makes sense you’re feeling it. Sometimes the hatred I feel toward my TF shows me where I hate myself. Like they’re holding up a mirror to my own shadow. The rage might be trying to protect you from how vulnerable it feels to love someone that deeply. Have you looked into any mirror work or shadow integration? Sometimes when I work on the parts of myself I’ve been rejecting, how I feel toward them starts to shift.
I feel you on this. When people romanticize meeting their twin flame, I want to warn them away because this level of pain comes from our deepest childhood wounds getting ripped open.
The hate you’re feeling might be redirected rage at whoever made you feel abandoned or invisible as a kid. He’s just triggering that original wound. That burning in your chest is real, and it doesn’t mean he’s not your twin - he might be showing you what you need to heal from your past.
Even when I wanted to hate him for things that would normally be dealbreakers for me, there was this annoying voice in my head that kept seeing why he was doing it. I could be furious and still somehow know he wasn’t trying to destroy me. He was just scared and making stupid choices because of it.
I’ve made my own stupid fear-based choices, too. I couldn’t really blame him for making the same mistakes I made.
That doesn’t mean the anger isn’t real or valid. But for me, what made this different from other connections was that the compassion lived right alongside the fury. I couldn’t fully hate him even when I desperately wanted to, because I could see his fear and pain driving everything. You’re allowed to be angry, that’s actually healthy. But if underneath it all you still feel that connection and some part of you still gets them even when they’re being insufferable… I don’t know. That says something.
I’ve been through those waves of anger too. For me it was more like devastation and disappointment, but I couldn’t hate them even when I wanted to.
Even when I was furious, I still felt that pull and their presence somehow. The grief and longing were worse than the anger. There’s something about feeling abandoned by someone who mirrors you so closely that just cuts deeper.
You can’t hate someone this intensely unless they matter on a soul level. I feel my twin’s hatred mixed with their love, and it’s the same energy, just different frequencies. The DM masculine runner energy (if that’s what he’s doing) isn’t about him living like you were nothing. Trust me, we feel everything. We just don’t know what the fuck to do with it, so we act like we don’t feel it at all. That probably makes it worse, I know.
You’re not chasing a karmic. A karmic wouldn’t have you feeling his presence while simultaneously wanting to burn his world down. The connection doesn’t disappear just because one or both of you is pissed off.
When you invest so much of yourself into someone and feel that deep connection, the disappointment can turn into something that feels like rage or hatred. The intensity of the love gets channeled into equally intense anger when you feel abandoned or betrayed. Those extreme emotions, swinging from love to hate and back again, don’t necessarily mean this person isn’t your twin flame. Sometimes it means the opposite. The connection is so powerful that when things aren’t going the way you hoped, your emotional response is just as powerful.
I know right now it feels impossible, but try to resist the urge to monitor what he’s doing. Every time you check in on him, you’re reopening the wound.
I pushed mine away with how harsh I got during my anger phases. If they’re really your twin, that connection doesn’t just disappear because you hate them right now. The fact that you can still feel his presence even while you’re burning with anger says something about whether he’s your TF or not.
I really hated him yesterday. for some reason my profile pic is my son but I am a women. I have been working very hard during this separation which is now in its third month of no contact. I have had every sign known to man and all pointing toward divine union. I know he is close I can feel it in my bones. So yesterday I get a reading saying he is trying to make up his mind if he wants to be with me. I was like are you kidding me? I literally wanted to strangle him. I was so angry and said I’m done. Not to decide is to decide so to hell with him. I thought I was so done with the lessens and that’s it I am done. I called a man I met recently and asked him out. we had a great time and he spent the night. So for the first time since I realized I had a twin two years ago I was with another man. I felt guilty this morning and then I realized what happened. This was my chance to not chase and control outcomes. This is when I am supposed to put everything I have learned into practice. I won’t be calling the other guy. If he calls me fine. I am no longer going to waste mt time trying to control outcomes. so now I don’t hate him. Of course I never did. I was angry and impatient all while trying to put a timeline on everything. But hate? I have never loved another human being as much as him. I will always love him even if the outcome I want doesn’t belong to me this time around. so thank you angels. thank you Danielle.
