Has Anyone Considered Giving Up?

General
21

Hi @eunichick, actually I’m relatively good. How about you? I don’t even cry when I heard about this. It just make me very disappointed. It’s like I don’t even have an excuse over this anymore. Because, there is a proof and it’s more like a pattern.

Only one bubble chat could destroy a girl reputation, the content of the chat will paint her as an easy girl. Whereas a girl only talk like that when she trust the man completely, and she got betrayed. He? Doesn’t have a remorse at all. Maybe he even see us as a problem that need to be fixed, at least that is what he said about her to my senior. A problem that could disturbed his happiness at this moment.

He even go as far as telling my friend to tell me to move on, twice, in different occasion, without being led on, although I do nothing. Didn’t even ask nor talk about him or text/try to call him, like he just got scared by himself.

I understand that we won’t know how this journey will unfold, or how our life will thrive along with this journey. But, for me there is some moral ground that can’t be crossed, for the example this one, sacrificing other that trust you is a big no. I could find excuse when he paint me as a woman who endlessly chasing, hoping that he would learn from it. But, he is still using the same tactics after. It’s sad, truly sad.

I kind of numb right now, but it make me focusing to myself more, caring to myself more, even push me to work on my neglected project and skill.

It’s just very unfortunate.

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22

It is very awful that he is going around spreading rumours like that. It’s unkind and unhealthy. It could be that he believes that version of the truth and is trying to put up a facade to hide his own insecurities. It is not the right thing to do, but it does show that he still has a lot of growing and learning to do.

Through my own journey, I have realised that focusing on myself was the only way to get through all the confusion and pain. It is hard some days, but it does get better with time. Be kind to yourself

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23

This morning, I saw a photo of him that triggered intense fear and made me question if he had truly moved on. I had felt detached for weeks, but seeing the photo brought all my feelings back. Right after, he accidentally sent me a restaurant link and quickly deleted it, yet it remained visible. The timing felt like a synchronicity, showing he hadn’t moved on and our connection persists. Could this accidental message be a telepathic or energetic synchronicity, and how should it be interpreted in our Twin Flames dynamic?

24

He believed it or he make himself believe it, that’s way he ‘complain’ to the right people who still see him as an angel. A validation. He built an image like that, that he is kind, diligent, handy, and helpful. In same degree, yes, he show those qualities. But, the other side of him, it’s like a shadow side that he hide. A secret. And I’m one of the people who maybe hold that information about him.

In my society, having sex before marriage still viewed as an inappropriate conduct, although many already see it as fine if it’s mutual. It’s a culture by the way. Also, many men still view women who already done the deed not with their spouse, as used goods, that could be used whenever and whoever. They talk about the person to their circle.

The most famous line for men, here is, “we (men) could be as wild as we could when we’re single, we could sleeping around as we want, but we’ll still choose upright woman that never being touched before as wife”

That’s why a single bubble chat could destroy one person’s reputation. And, actually a men who sleeping around like that will be view as a rake with bad reputation. It make sense why he protect his image so hard, and of course you now understand why I’m very careful about that and refuse his request without proper commitment.

So, you’re right. Maybe some connection need to be separated because of some reason. I won’t know if he truly my TF or not. But, I understand that coming across twin flame term isn’t coincidental, and honestly I got a lot of lesson from this path. It’s 3 years of meaningful experience, truly.

I’ll focusing on myself, wholeheartedly, and let universe decide which path I should walk with head high. No, I’m not leaving. I just feel numb with all this ordeal.

By the way, if some day you want to reach out to me privately, I have the same account name as the one I use here in instagram and threads, feel free to contact me😁

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25

I try to give up nearly every day after 2 years of separation and the interference of a karmic. Something almost always pulls me back.

Yesterday it happened in the span of 10 minutes. I felt like, ok, I can just let him go. On my terms, not just because she told me to 18 months ago. I am done worrying about him, wondering what really happened to admit feelings and end it a month later. It doesn’t matter. We won’t be together in this lifetime. And 10 minutes later I was hit with so much pain wondering about something he said about a “she” that night and “money” visibly distraught. I got so angry at myself for not prying at that moment or at any other time while we were still talking. I think I didnt want to face that there could be someone else. But I dont think it was romantic and I don’t think he even wanted to break up. I don’t know if it was her or if the feelings were too much. I think it’s both because he had already said that he had feelings.He didn’t know how to deal with.

I digress. The point I guess is Ive tried and have only succeeded for a few days. But i’m still trying, because I can’t live like this anymore.

I can work on me all I want. But if it doesn’t have any effect on him and my intuition says it hasn’t - he is still overwhelmed, confused, and distracted - then why even worry about him?

Everything points to us being twin flames. I have never felt so at home and safe with another human being. I’ve never held someone in my heart so deeply for 2 years with no contact. But if he won’t work on himself or awaken then why should I hold on?

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26

Good morning. I tried to give up but my twin always comes in my dreams saying don’t leave him. His has alot of things to take care of before we can move forward. Im not the type to wait around. I met new people but my mind always drift back to him. I know he probably been with someone else but he will hide it Its since he is on my sister’s bowling team and he have to see her every weekend..smh. I never been in a connection like this. This is stressful

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27

What if the fact that you can’t let go IS the effect your work is having?

Think about it. You said your intuition says he’s still overwhelmed, confused, and distracted. But you’re here and you’re processing. That’s one half of the same soul evolving.

28

Had something so similar happen to me. I went through a phase where I was completely determined to move on. I even deleted every photo, unfollowed everything, the whole nine yards. And then that very night, I had the most vivid dream where my twin was just sitting next to me, calm as anything, saying ‘I’m still here.’ I woke up sobbing. It happened three more times that week. Every time I tried to mentally close the door, he’d show up in my dreams like he had a key.

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29

The way they construct a narrative to protect themselves is often a complete mirror of their own deep-held fear of being exposed or vulnerable. Textbook trigger response. He’s being triggered by intimacy and vulnerability, and instead of sitting with that discomfort, he projects it outward and paints the other person as the problem.

Your numbness right now might actually be your system protecting you from re-engaging with that trigger loop. Detachment isn’t giving up :heart:

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30

Many many many times. And every single time I tried to write this connection off, I’d get hit with a new burst of syncs and signs (one of the most devastating was a random call from someone with their name who was “returning my call”. I had no idea what he was talking about but the night before, I’d cried and even attempted to severe the connection myself because of how much it hurt).

But something shifted in me the past few days and I think a big message I’d been circling finally clicked.

I am better than an unrequited love. I am better than a love that demands suffering. I am worthy of a love where I just get to be. So when it comes to the version of my twin who showed me this high frequency connection, only to lose the ability to stay in it with me, I don’t want to stay connected. I want the version of that deep connection that shows up for me and sticks around long enough to love me back. I want the version of the fated connection that I now recognise that I deserve. So all of a sudden, it feels possible for me to say that the old version of us is well and truly dead and done without feeling like I’m abandoning the whole connection.

I don’t know if any of this makes sense, but the point is that, at a certain point, you have to demand a higher standard even from your own twin. And if they’re not willing to do the work, then hold the idea that the high frequency need will be met anyway by someone the universe provides you who is able to love you and support you in the right way. And like…it doesn’t feel like a compromise or a Plan B. I think it’s a version of surrender.

So I think maybe when that feeling of wanting to quit comes up, it isn’t actually about you wanting to give up, but maybe it’s a sign of something you finally need to come to terms with? Maybe it’s the friction between your current self still staying connected to the past and your higher self needing you to let go?

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31

I gave up yesterday. I will not be taking him back.

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32

Have replied here before, but just wanted to add something that has got me the closest to giving up that I probably ever would have been.

My twin and I work together and when I have tried to be sincere to him about something, he has had a habit of responding with, “Well that’s not my problem any more,” or, “Well I won’t be losing any sleep over it.” Really dismissive attitude, and could be interpreted as quite horrible and disrespectful especially if you are having a sensitive day.

At these times it has been extremely hard not to snap back, “If that’s how you feel, go and do one, I don’t want to work with someone like this,” (I never have, just ignored and carried on), but then I process it and get back to the rational reality that it’s him trying to cover over his fear of vulnerability. If he acts like he doesn’t care then he doesn’t have to acknowledge that fear and other people won’t know it exists… in his mind, anyway.

I have my own fears which makes it a bit easier to understand his, but in the heat of the moment when the pain strikes after he has said something like that - oof, yes, I am often on the point of saying shove it and it feels like a Herculean effort to stop myself throwing in the towel altogether. It feels like a whole lot of work for not a huge amount of progress. However, if he is still doing it, then I do have more work to do too. I need to get to the point where it doesn’t hurt that he is behaving like this. It’s not a comment on my worth so I need to stop internalising it as such, and try getting the better of my own fears.

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33

I literally almost made this exact post last week so yeah, you’re definitely not alone here.

I almost walked away dozens of times… maybe hundreds. I really like that term, ascension fatigue… it seems to explain it pretty well. Your energy gets drained because you’re basically sharing an energy source with someone else and when things are out of sync, both of you burn out.

Maybe giving up comes from fear and exhaustion - that feeling of ‘they’ll never love me.’ Surrender is about letting go of trying to control the outcome. You release the attachment to the timeline without abandoning your love for them. You stop obsessing over when they’ll return or wake up.

So yes, I’ve considered it many times. Still here though. Just trying to focus inward more.

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34

Well, after reading this why do I even bother.

[quote=“MirrorWork, post:3, topic:1120”]

I would also read this if you haven’t already where @Cassady talks about what the twin flame journey is really about (and why over 90% of people won’t end separation anyway):

[/quote]

I know it’s about yourself and all that but this just send me back into a negative spiral. Guess i’m still too much into the happily ever after scenario (i will read the thread this quote was about though).

I just don’t want anyone else.

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35

The dark side of separation is real. And nobody talks about it.

All this unconditional love stuff sounds nice but… where are the people who’ve actually been through it?

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36

There’s a thread around about this, but most people who go through it then move on from communities like this. There are a rare few who check back in to share advice with others, but I’ve also seen a few say that the community scares them off. I think the growth of toxic gatekeeping might have something to do with it.

They do exist however.

37

They have better things to be doing than hanging around us :laughing:

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38

Burnout is becoming way more common now. Maybe just the world in general is getting harder. It does feel like more people are feeling exhausted and desperate about their connection lately.

I wanted to give up when I was in separation. Multiple times. I don’t think it means anything is wrong, it’s just part of the journey that usually just is incredibly hard. I think most social media doesn’t do a fair job of telling people what they’re getting themselves in for.

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39

Okay but… what if genuinely giving up is actually the most spiritually aligned move you could make right now?

I went through this last year where I completely, authentically surrendered - told the universe I was done, started dating someone new with real intention, fully released any expectation of reunion.

Authentic letting go is different from strategic detachment, and the universe seems to respond to that.

40

You never give up. Focusing on your own growth whether it’s self love or another area that needs healing helps you to accept where you are on the journey. The pain of missing them will come and go but the main purpose is to awaken you spiritually so you can heal. As my healing is progressing I can’t hear him as much but I believe in Divine timing everything will come together.

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