My twin flame is with someone else. Living together and everything.
I know I know all the logic of karmics and this is probably part of their journey and without them we couldn’t reach union but it hurts. It hurts so much. I wish it didn’t… I wish I could be stronger but more than that I wish they were not in the arms of someone else right now.
But what really hurts is the mixed signals. The energy between us always felt mutual, like he knew exactly what this connection was (and I mean knew, not just picked up on it passively). I just cannot wrap my head around how someone holds that kind of space with you while quietly building a whole life with someone else.
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I know your pain but I can truly say that if this is a true twin flame journey, you will eventually get over that feeling. I have been on this journey for 8 years now and my DM has been with his 3rd party for about 5 of those years. I used to feel the same way you feel but I grew to understand that his karmic is important. She plays a special role in this entire scenario and although it may seem like he “chose” the karmic, that’s not true. Your twin flame loves you more than any karmic. I know it’s easier said than done but try not to focus on or even think about the karmic. It’s not about them. It’s all confusing until one day, it isn’t. Sending good vibes your way, luv
I hear you, and I’m sorry for what you’re feeling. The living together part is a total gut punch.
Runners feel that pull deeply. Their soul longs for yours even while their mind fights it. That’s those intense moments where it feels like he knows, because on a soul level, he does. But 3D fear kicks in, and he retreats to what’s safe. Karmic partners don’t push growth. They accept him without the work you’d demand, facing all his fears. That’s terrifying if he’s not ready, so he stays there. The mixed signals come from soul truth versus ego fear. Both are real.
Gently, don’t put your life on hold waiting. It adds pressure, doesn’t speed things up. Easier said than felt, I know.
Third-party situations are temporary, with no real foundation like a twin flame bond. She’s probably filling needs for love or safety (totally normal), but only your TF can do it perfectly. It might look like a full life from the outside (runners seem to go out of their way to make it seem like that), but something’s missing for him.
He can genuinely care about her during separation. That’s real, doesn’t cancel your connection. But it’s not the same depth. Often, they don’t fully know yet, or it scares them. They rationalize: “I’m not ready” or “We have history.” It’s all about healing and not being ready for union.
I know it doesn’t ease the pain of watching this. But third parties do end. Karmics have a ceiling twin flames don’t. Pour that love back into yourself right now.
You’re certainly not alone. These are from today alone:
Divine masculines often stay in matrix mode after awakening: career, distractions, or karmic partners, anything to avoid facing emotions. They feel the pull but pick the easy, controllable path. Emotions scare them. Runner/chaser flips eventually, and karmics expire once the lesson’s learned. No real growth there. It catches up. Right now, it’s about you. The hurt highlights your abandonment wounds and self-worth. Healing them raises his vibe too; your growth is shared at the soul level.
The biggest thing for me was just making myself my main priority. Full stop.
My twin is with a karmic right now too, and the pain is real (god is it real), but focusing on my own purpose has changed everything during this time. I’m working on my goals and becoming who I’m meant to be by pouring energy back into my own growth instead of obsessing over what he’s doing.
The sting still hits sometimes. Less consuming now, though. He’s learning his own lessons through this karmic situation, and it’s part of his journey for our greater good, even when that’s hard to accept.
His choosing someone else was the easier choice for him, something he can actually understand and control. That says more about where he is than where you stand.
What helped me see it clearly was noticing our life path numbers match exactly. That kind of alignment doesn’t just disappear because he’s with someone else. Certain actions from my twin showed me this karmic relationship is something he needs to go through, precisely because we can’t be together right now.
I think it ties directly into the mirror work we’re all called to do on this journey. When we feel that intense pain around the 3rd party, that’s a massive trigger, and triggers are always invitations to look inward. What is the karmic situation mirroring back to us? Usually, it’s our own deep wounds around abandonment, unworthiness, and believing we’re not enough.
Our unhealed reflection is the real obstacle, not the karmic.
Once you start doing that inner work consistently, really sitting with those triggers and tracing them back to their root, the obsession with the karmic naturally fades, just like you experienced. Recognize the pain as a signpost pointing you toward your next layer of healing, instead of ignoring it. Every single trigger is a gift wrapped in discomfort.
Finding what makes you passionate, learning to sit with yourself without feeling lonely, or picking up a creative hobby. That’s the actual work. They’re waiting for you to do it. I’ve learned that dating someone else just delays reunion every time, without fail.
I used to feel guilty about how much energy I was sending my TF. When I moved from 3D thinking into 4D, I started feeling proud of all that unconditional love instead. They’re running because there’s growth needed on both sides, and the timeline is really in your hands based on how much you lean into the work versus the distractions. Just my experience.
Oh my gosh, that would be unbearable. My TF and his karmic didn’t progress to that stage. Broke my heart in 2 just knowing he chose somebody else. It didn’t work out. He said he thought he could do better, but realized I was better. Took a long time to get that trust back(or so I thought) and he still lied to me, about alot of things. So much so, my guardian angels stepped in and separated us. Cut off all ability to communicate. If you wonder if your angels are there for your higher good, believe me they are, and it brought me back from the edge of flipping out.
This is their learning curve. My tf started dating someone about a year and a half ago, and it’s been the biggest catalyst for my own growth, way more than I expected. I stopped obsessing over when they’ll figure it out and started focusing on my own spiritual development instead.
We talked recently, and something was different. I can feel it, but I’m not sitting around waiting for external validation anymore. That part is done. No matter if they’re ready to step up or not, I’m ascending regardless (and that took me a while to actually mean). Your twin’s situation is temporary. Your growth doesn’t have to be dependent on their timeline.
I’m in the opposite position. I’m married to a soul mate. I still feel the ache (I was the runner - I experienced my surrender moment/kundalini activation/spiritual awakening last June).
I found this visualization helped me cope with the “magnet” when it’s really intense. I visualize sending his energy back to him, calling my energy back and then thinning the cord between us to a golden thread.
Yes, and it really hurts, especially when you’re at the other end of the world. TF connections are not for the faint of hearts, it demands resilience, strength, compassion and above all, real unconditional love.
Sorry if this is a bit off-topic. Has anyone else found that stepping back from always being the initiator actually hurts less than you’d expect? Mine had a girlfriend when I tried to meet up last year, and I recently just stopped reaching out. It was always me first.
I thought it would be devastating but honestly, focusing on myself and building up my confidence has made the separation way more bearable than I anticipated (almost weirdly so). Still believe we could work out eventually. But for now I am using this time to grow while he works through his own stuff.
